Finding Beauty in the Process and Accepting What We Cannot Control

Jennifer Jones
Nov 16
3 min read

Finding Beauty in the Process

For years I have looked forward to going gray. I imagined my hair turning that beautiful silvery gray. I pictured myself letting it grow just past my shoulders and sweeping it back with great majesty. I have met many women who seem to have been blessed with such a gorgeous mane.

the mirror, searching for those fine silvery strands and hoping they have multiplied overnight. Watching for them has not made them appear.

A while back it was time for a trim. I took myself to the salon, ready to have a few inches cut off.

“When does hair start turning gray?” I asked. After getting my age, the stylist replied, “Oh, you are one of those women.”

What do you mean, one of those women?

Matt has the silvery hair I have wanted for a long time.

It was one of those funny life moments. A compliment and a reality check at the same time. Apparently once you reach your mid-fifties with very few gray hairs, you are likely to never have the silvery locks you have fantasized about or at least not until you are truly old.

This made me think. How often do we wait for something to happen that we cannot control. I could bleach my hair to make it gray, but why would I do that. I have never colored my hair before, and I cannot imagine starting now.

It may be years before I am blessed with the silvery locks of my dreams and it may never happen at all. But the process is the important part. Sometimes letting nature take its course is best.

This interaction stayed with me. It reminded me of my painting process.

When I look back on the beginning of my artistic journey, I remember when I believed with my whole heart that every painting deserved to be custom framed. I had poured my blood, sweat, and often tears into each one, so how could it not be worthy of a frame.

Now I know better. Not every painting deserves to be framed. Some paintings deserve to be painted over or maybe even burned.

Matt, my "other" half and the guy with the history degree, tells me to stop painting over my early work. He says that without them there is no way to tell the story of my artistic development. I nod along, and then silently wonder what he really knows about it.

The truth is that the beauty of art lies in the process. The missteps, the risks, the accidents that lead to unexpected revelations. Every brushstroke reflects my growth, my struggles, and my triumphs. Some of the best parts of a painting come from the unplanned moments.

Just like life.

Maybe I will never get my magnificent mane of silver. In both art and life there is beauty in the process. Creating is not only about the final piece. It is about exploration, experimentation, and growth. The anticipation of going gray mirrors the artistic journey. Both require patience and acceptance of what unfolds.

As I navigate this phase of life, I am learning to appreciate the present moment rather than fixating on what may or may not come. Whether I am waiting for gray hair, enjoying the vibrancy of my natural color, or exploring my creativity, I am discovering joy in the journey.

Paintings are like life. Some days everything flows and some days nothing does. But if I keep showing up, if I keep layering and adjusting and staying present, something begins to emerge.

Often it is not what I planned. Sometimes it is something better.

Whether it is the aging process, my artistic path, or simply moving into a new stage of life, the lesson remains the same. Trust the process. Let go of the outcome. Stay open to what unfolds.

So here is the journey, gray hair or not. Let us celebrate the layers we build, the mistakes we paint over, and the unexpected beauty that arrives when we least expect it.

Every painting tells a story, and every passing year does too.

What part of your journey are you learning to embrace? Share your story in the comments, I ’d love to hear how you’re finding beauty in your own process.